After some comments from None last week I’m trying to be more understanding in forming opinions of the Tudela’s. There have been many comments made by those who know the Tudelas personally and they all say the same things. The Tudelas always reach out and try to help others in need. They have a reputation for being caring people who would sacrifice to help others. They stand by those they care about.
Possibly the reason it’s been hard for me to put myself in their shoes is because their son lives near them and our sons live a good distance away. When our sons were growing up, Lee and I developed relationships with some of our sons’ friends, many spent time at our home and we fostered two of them. We still have occasional calls or visits from their friends but after our sons moved from the area, we don’t have the contact with their friends like Heidi may have or has had with Justin. At least not enough if they were in a situation like Justin’s for us to be confident in their honesty and innocence. Kids grow up and they can change from the boy you knew to someone whose actions you later wouldn’t recognize as being theirs.
When my boys’ friends were around I would defend them, protect them, and discipline them the same as I would my boys. If they were hurt I would nurse them. If they were scared I would try to comfort them. If they were angry I would try to calm them. If they were wronged I would try to make it right. If they were lied to I would try to make them see the truth. If they were in danger I would warn them. If they were manipulated I would try to help them see it. I’m going to assume Heidi would do the same with Derek’s friends, including Justin. I think the “Mom” in most of us would.
Looking at it from this perspective helps me to see that this may be all there is to the Tudelas involvement in Ayla’s case. Unfortunately it also brings new questions to my mind. I knew my sons’ friends’ parents, siblings and girlfriends but not nearly as well as I knew the boys themselves. If I knew the boy well enough to know he was innocent and telling the truth, in a situation like Justin is in, I would be looking at his mom, sister and girlfriend under a microscope once LE said some of them were withholding information. Even if they lived in my home for two weeks, my trust in them would not automatically be an extension from my trust in the boy.
If LE said they found his daughter’s blood in his bedroom, the discovery was troubling, there was no abduction and she is probably dead, and I knew without a doubt that he would never hurt his daughter, I would agree to view the slideshow if LE asked me to. The “Mom” in me would be thinking one of the others may have hurt his daughter and they were lying to him. As horrible as it would be to see those photos, I would do it in case he needed me to carefully and slowly help him to come to the understanding that someone really did hurt his baby girl. If his mom might be covering for his sister, I couldn’t count on her to be truthful with him or help him through the healing process.
As far as I know the Tudelas haven’t agreed to view the slideshow but maybe they have and we aren’t aware of it. I would if I were in Heidi’s shoes. Would you?
Maine State Police Tip Line – 207-624-7076
Friends For Ayla 